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I wanted to know if height was the only difference and the constant deal breaker. And no amount of complaining is going to change it. And why, in God’s name, is it important to stand on your tiptoes to kiss a guy? Is there any legitimate reason not to go out with this amazing, amazing man? So I moved my profile from Pittsburgh and posted it for 3 days in a town where nobody knew me (Philadelphia).

If you’re a regular reader, you probably knew that I was on the CBS Early Show in July. We wrote two new profile essays that were unique, funny and confident.

Appearing with me was one of my all-time favorite clients, Tom Pandolfo. We renamed him “Look Ma No Hair.”And we watched as his in-box filled up with interested women.

It's OK — it's right — for a big dude to have a skinny wife. He respected and encouraged every dream and every goal to implant itself into my brain.

He can protect her and look after her and make her feel and look like a princess. Well, she may as well be castrating him of all his manly cis-glory and strength. And she'd look even fatter (can't you just hear all those audible gasps in the distance? But, of course, he was two inches shorter and 100 pounds lighter. When I first introduced Paddy to relatives a year after we'd gotten together (because that first year was spent whilst I was studying abroad in Europe, and so meeting anyone in the family was pretty impossible and unnecessary — it was glorious), the obvious reactions ensued.

Here’s what I found: This proves, in stark and undeniable terms, two things:…Life – and people – can be incredibly unfair.

Short men are screwed when it comes to dating, right?It wasn't that I was fat, or horribly concerned with how a boy would perceive that fatness.It was more that I was taught that a woman (especially a fuller-figured and tall woman) must only date a man who was even more fuller-figured and taller than she was.I didn’t want to mention it for the same reason that Tom didn’t want to mention it in his profile: because it’s irrelevant to anything that makes him a good accountant, husband, or father.Yet his height defines him, since it has prevented otherwise interested women from being interested in him over the course of his entire life. He’s just been confronted with a very ugly reality that has shaken his confidence in people.But the idea that in order for a woman to be worth anything she must be thin is not one I support, or feel the need to perpetuate. The reality is that passing up a kind and honorable guy just because he isn't big is ridiculous.