Here is how the header pins are numbered: Here is a table showing which header pins should be connected to what parallel pins. Here's what my cable looks like (Note: it looks like the power lead is connected to the DB25 but in fact it is solder to the ribbon, it goes to pin 1 on the header) If you use a cable similar to mine, open it up and desolder the ribbon from the connector.
The bios isn't removable, so surely there's some kind of device they plug into to reflash it for you I thought. Next to the BIOS chip, to the left of the south bridge, is an undocumented 7 pin connector labeled SPI_J1.
After a lot research I stumbled upon a few pages (linked at the bottom) that documented the type of cable necessary and the software to use this port to reflash the bios.
First, you need to run cwsdpmi.exe, then run spipgm.
(Note: you have to run before SPIPGM each time.) It will ask for the total size of the flashrom, enter 1024 If SPIPGM reports your chip id as fffffffh then something isn't right. SPIPGM has several functions, such as erasing the BIOS first. Giving credit where credit is due, without these sites I never would have figured this out.
I confirm I successfully programmed my flash IC for an ASUS P8H67-M-PRO. I built the parallel adapter, I added a 3.3vdc power supply and used it to program my flash memory chip.